From the Pit Read online

All the secrets that we keep.

  There is no shining moment

  Where we raise a head once bowed,

  There is just the field before us

  That we left unmown, unplowed.

  If we weep upon the water

  And we sleep upon the sand,

  We can bury our indifference

  But we'll never take a stand.

  We evoke the fifth amendment

  In each conversation had

  And our sins will be forgiven

  In our private Holy Land.

  **********

  Selling Our Souls

  There comes a time when we all have to stand,

  Take responsibility for the things that we can,

  Admit where we failed and try to begin

  Selling our souls all over again.

  There comes a time when we all have to bend,

  Give up our will for family or friend,

  Shaking our faith with our new found sin,

  Selling our souls all over again.

  There's no place to hide

  With the demon inside.

  Oh, what will become of us now?

  You find the best price

  And with innocent eyes,

  To the pressures of conscience you bow.

  There comes a time when we all break down,

  Tear off the bonds that have kept us bound,

  Wallow in fear at the places we've been,

  Selling our souls all over again.

  **********

  Sojourn of the Mind

  The dark and dangerous journey

  Through the chasms of your mind;

  Down the twisted paths, discerning

  Every crevice that you find.

  You can wander through the turnings,

  Shocked at how it deftly winds.

  How unrecognized the yearnings,

  How uncouth, how cruel, unkind,

  Were the passions in you burning

  Unsuspected all the time.

  **********

  Taken

  (Religion)

  The distribution of my sanity has left me pale and shaken,

  But I know the words to say to prove I have not been forsaken.

  I can fall down on my knees

  For however long I please

  But it doesn't change a thing; I have been taken.

  The great intention of society has all but been forgotten

  And it seems like everything has turned perverse and foully rotten.

  I can sit and watch TV

  While the images numb me

  But I live with what I see, that's where I've gotten.

  Can't change a thing, no use to try.

  I guess I'll live; I'd rather die.

  It's easier to sit and whine

  In this age of 'I want mine'.

  Kiss my ass and go to hell,

  Burn the cross and break the bell;

  The Bible that they're preaching now

  Is on the other side, somehow.

  The desperation of my vanity has often been mistaken

  For a confidence I lack and a need that I awaken.

  I have sheltered this disease,

  Now it brings me to my knees

  And it overshadows me; I have been taken.

  **********

  Thank You for the Mirror

  Thank you for the mirror,

  Makes it easier to see

  What's hidden behind your smile

  And eyes, so sly and empty.

  If I were the one

  That slept in the shadowed dreams

  In the center of his heart,

  Do you think I'd let you see?

  Thank you for the mirror,

  Takes me back a long, long way.

  Back to laughter in the halls,

  Embraces in the doorway.

  If I were the one

  That was captured by his spell,

  Makes him sing from memory,

  Do you really think I'd tell?

  Go ahead and run

  Perhaps you are the only one.

  Only his heart can tell

  Who's spell it's under.

  Thank you for the mirror,

  Thought I'd a realistic view,

  But you show'd me I was wrong,

  I would never challenge you.

  What if I am the one

  That goes dancing in his heart;

  Running, playing hide and seek

  While you tear your heart apart?

  Go ahead and run,

  But what if you're the one?

  Only his heart can tell

  Who's spell it's under.

  **********

  The Anchor

  Do you find yourself in strange places

  With too many faces

  Of people you don't really know?

  Do you walk without knowing

  Just where you are going,

  When you're not sure that you want to go?

  Are you out of control,

  Just cast in the role

  Of lover, or loser, or friend,

  And you don't feel the part

  But you haven't the heart

  To stop 'til you come to the end?

  Are you drifting along

  Like the words to a song,

  Not sure what the outcome will be?

  Though the line may be long,

  The anchor is strong,

  Just latch on and cling tight to me.

  **********

  The Madness

  Twist the walls and see them shatter;

  Burst the blood and make it splatter,

  Running rivers from the dawning

  'Til the end of sacred time.

  Hear the roar of the cascading

  Flames of death that fall upon us

  With no rhyming and no reason,

  Stating just that it's the season

  For the madness to consume us

  Once again, in ethnic cleansing.

  Lift your skirts to keep them clean;

  In this world that cannot be,

  For we're tied to one another

  And to all humanity.

  There is no innocence, no plea

  "It was done by him, not me."

  We were there - we didn't stop it,

  We pretended not to see.

  **********

  The Past

  What is the past?

  Only excess baggage

  Interfering with today.

  If we were really

  Wise men,

  We'd throw it all away.

  **********

  The Tangled Star

  The tangled star and the twisted cross

  Clashed in hell and the ghetto lost,

  But she rose again midst fire and flame

  In another land, by another name.

  The twisted cross fell by the hand

  Of different men from different lands,

  But the years have passed and the twisted cross

  Still spews its venom and is not forgot.

  Its hatred sparks and starts new flames,

  But the tangled star still remains.

  She'll fight and she'll die, but she will not bend;

  For the tangled star will not crawl again.

  **********

  This Savage Soil

  This savage soil, stained by the blood of your sons,

  Lies bare and stark beneath the pallid sun.

  Snow pellets cling to the dried yellow masts

  Of the weeds as they tremble in winter's blast

  Standing bleak and dismal o'er their hallowed bones,

  These lone brittle tufts the only headstones.

  Gazing across the silent terrain, who'd guess

  Beneath this frozen turf what preciousness

  Lies sleeping, lost in vain, to save this land.

  Struck down in youth by the hatred of man,

  They went before, leaving behind only tears
br />   Of their loved ones to fill the empty years.

  What mother, wife or sweetheart did not feel pain,

  Mingled with pride, as she looked o'er the plain,

  To lock this picture in mind's eye,

  To whisper in her heart one last goodbye.

  **********

  Upon the Red Clay

  To the old church come I,

  To weep and to pray.

  My lover lies dying

  Upon the red clay.

  A sword in his young heart;

  What matters how brave

  He fought for his country;

  He's dying today.

  O' a soldier's a thief,

  Your heart he will take.

  A soldier's a liar

  With vows that he makes.

  A soldier's a killer,

  He'll destroy your life

  And leave you a widow

  Instead of a wife.

  **********

  What Used to Be

  (To Robert)

  Your touch, your lips, your arms, your face

  Are just lonely memories.

  How much I wish to grasp the days

  And bring them all back here to me.

  Regret, remorse are but a waste,

  Longing for what used to be,

  But your sweet love and tender grace

  I shan't forget eternally.

  **********

  Why do You Wait

  Why do you wait, so gentle and kind?

  There are others who'd love you far better than I.

  Others who'd hold you, so tender and tight,

  And call out your name in the dark of the night.

  Why do you wait so patient, my sweet,

  When you know there are others more worthy than me?

  I'm often ungrateful, selfish, cruel,

  Thoughtless, uncaring, and a bit of a fool.

  Still, if you will, wait for me, lover.

  I fear the day when I know you'll discover

  I'm not worth the effort or the pain;

  You've waited, my darling, these years all in vain.

  **********

  You are a Stranger

  You are a stranger unto me,

  Hid in the shadows of my heart;

  A ghost that haunts my shattered sleep

  And leaves me empty, torn apart.

  Where are the words to heal my wounds,

  To soothe my tired, weary soul?

  Why must you send me to my doom,

  Blind and whimpering in the cold?

  **********

  You Run Away

  I am a torch that burns for you,

  Flames for you, writhes for you.

  I am a passion that dies for you;

  In the winds of Egella I cry for you,

  But you run away, you run away.

  I am a song that sings for you,

  Prays for you, begs for you.

  I am a melody played for you,

  'Ginst the moaning thunder, I sway for you,

  But you run away, you never stay.

  I am a soul that sighs for you

  Tries for you, glides for you.

  I am a sun that would rise for you,

  All the depths of the darkness I'd light for you,

  But you run away, you run away.

  **********

  Bonnie Mutchler has written hundreds of poems since her childhood, several of which have been published in anthologies. She lives in Missouri with her one eyes cat Blinky and loves her Super Poke Pet, Clucky.

  You can find Bonnie on:

  MySpace: https://www.myspace.com/moonvapors

  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bonnie.mutchler

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